Blasphemy

I think at some point in our lives we all begin to dabble in the alternative “spiritual” arts realm. How can you not, in this day and age with it being pushed on you through the alternative mass media marketing machine, it is like the eye of Mordor. We the poor sure footed little hobbitses trying to fumble our way along the path fraught with the impending peril that is our lives according to CNN.

I mean, I don’t think everyone and their dog will end up picking up one of those sappy over processed Doreen Virtue Angel books. But I think at some point we all begin to wonder, just what the hell is out there “watching, guiding”.

I saw Doreen Virtue speak in Toronto once years back, and was amazed at the sheer number of people looking to her for some angelic guidance. It was like being submerged in that scene from the movie The Life of Brian, “blessed are the cheese makers, or any such producers of dairy products”. Christ the “meek not the Greek, will inherit the earth”. I remember Steven, Matt, and I thinking “this is a cash cow for this woman” why not keep manifesting that gravy train baby.

So after seeing this display, I was no way inspired to dye my hair angelic blonde and join the angel covenant, but I did want to experiment with this communication aspect. I thought perhaps one of her books would at least be entertaining. So hence the purchase “Healing with the Angels”.

I read it and waited for the signs and communication to begin. Once I was able to drop my sarcastic edge, something did happen that was indeed profound.

Here is the raw version, straight out of my diary that I was keeping at that time which came across my path in our boxes shipped from Saudi.

04/23/01

LOVE! I don’t know what happened but it is all gone! Washed away last night. I began thinking about all of the pain, hurt, tension, stress, confusion that I needed to let go of and my body became very warm. Seething, with sensation starting in my hands and pulsing through my body slowly like a current. My body began to lift off of the bed. I could see my hound Stuart standing below, watching intently, like he was holding space and witness to this absolute miracle. I had no idea that reading those simplistic Doreen Virtue Angel books could set the stage to such a grand meeting as this.

My body was being lifted and rocked slowly and gently by the most glorious Archangel Michael. I began to let go and trust. Trust in those giant wings for support. I began to ask for love and cleansing. Asking my angel to show me the way. With every breath, my body would rise and fall in those enormous wings like a dance. I can still feel the residual pulsing of unconditional love and solid foundation.

When I opened my eyes, I was contorted into an awkward position, one that would have been normally, very uncomfortable and painful. As I lifted my head all I could say was it’s gone! It’s all gone!

My reflection against the wall did not look like me. For the first time in months, I felt happy, loved, and supported. I felt like I was in a daze. The hardships of the past years of my life did not matter anymore. What people thought of me did not matter anymore. I think that I had just learned to love myself, accept who I was. If I was worthy of this great experience, I must be worthy of my own love and support. More guidance please, more guidance please was all I could think.

So why am I sharing this? So you know, you don’t’ just have to read Doreen Virtue books to have a brush with the angels. I thought I would let you know that reaming out the angels with blasphemous statements also works to get their attention! Perhaps I should write a book called “Ass kick the Angels: Angelic Blasphemy By God it Works!”

I was having the shittiest day ever still grappling with the transitions and move back to Niagara. Matt had been gone now almost a week to work in Manila, the start of his 6 week tour. I was firmly entrenched in the perils of single parentdom with the boys who are no easy piece of cake crying and asking for daddy every five minutes.

Then comes the call form Canadian Customs who would not release our household shipment; which sets in motion, reschedule of movers, drive to Pearson which takes 7 hours in total on the hottest day of the summer, and 3 hours of reorganizing a storage locker on the third floor of a tin covered storage building in 46 degree heat.

So while driving back to Niagara, I decided I had had enough.

I entered back into a hysteric why the hell has this all happened to me, “fucking embezzlement, fucking Saudi, I just want to bite someone in the face” break down and began to call the angels on their shit!

It kinda rolled like this, with snot and tears flying, and swerving all over the road:

Where the hell are you Brigit and Michael anyway? Have you not been listening? Where the hell do all of my apparent “Conversations with God” go? What happened to your reassuring voices stating this new phase of my life will be better than I could have ever imagined! Are you aware I am on my own, raising two small children under the age of five, in a place I did not want to return too, while fighting with Canada Customs agents about my choices to move to Saudi Arabia because as a good sensible Canadian I must clearly be out of my fucking mind to move to a place like that. So I should expect to be hairy assed by these uneducated Customs freaks that have never experienced life outside of their little red neck I work for the government-fucking box.

Please remember I did say blasphemous!

I did finish up with “if you are really there, get your angelic heads out of your Asses, and pony up bitches!”

Well, one hour later when I walked in the front door of my home you would not believe what I found, and I sent this email to my beautiful niece Alexis to thank her for providing the card, which was the vehicle for which Brigit and Michael chose to communicate with me after I reamed them out. I don’t think she would mind me sharing…

Alexis,

I wanted you to know how loved and special you are!

I have been having a very difficult day, struggling. As I drove home I had a very long conversation with Spirit, Brigit and Archangel Michael. I asked for a sign that I was being guided and supported through my tears of sorrow, and through these difficult transitions.

When I arrived home, the little "Thinking of you" card, which you left for me, which I had put on our corkboard with a pin was miraculously lying at my front door. (A whole other side of the house btw) I looked down and saw "Thinking of You".

This made my heart sing, because I know that I am being loved and supported from beyond and the miracle of the card being moved just for me to find is my sign!

Know that I love and adore you and think of you always. You are my angel... :) Anytime you would like to come stay with me or go shopping you are most welcome. I would love that. It gets a bit lonely with only the small boys here with me.

Angela

Alexis’s message to me verbatim was this:

“Thinking of You”

I know you have been struggling with a lot lately, and I just wanted to congratulate you on still working hard to be the best mom and wife you can be.

Alexis

My point: Screw the Doreen Virtue books, Ass kicking the angels appears to be just as effective!